Sunday, February 01, 2015

Da Big Easy - Part 2

a/k/a - That's wasn't so easy, was it?

Recap - So, we left our intrepid trio, we heard the dulcet tones of the Technicolor Yawn coming from the little room in the wee hours of the morning...

Knowing this would be a rough time for the girls in the (later) AM I set my alarm for 7:00 and was soon in the arms of blissful slumber.

At 6:58 I was up, dressed and ready to go- I was surprised at how clean the bathroom was that morning based on the noises from the night before...
I expected it to look like a crime scene, but nope- it was in pristine condition.

My early departure was two-fold- first - I had an errand to run, and second, that errand was best done early... the longer you wait, the longer it will take...

I made for the corner of Decatur and St. Ann (800 Decatur) and the famous Cafe du Monde to get a New Orleans Hangover Dissipation Kit: A couple cafe au laits and a big bag of beginets to bring back to the girls.
Being quite early, and knowing that they were still a-snoozing, I sat at a table and enjoyed a small au lait and listened to a street performer doing some acapella gospel songs for the early-morning crowd.
As I finished my coffee, the to-go order arrived and I was ready to leave-
In the 20 minutes that elapsed from my arrival then line had grown from one or two people waiting for tables to 30 or so folks in line stretching back down Decatur.
Listen to your Uncle Jay- you want the good donuts-and-coffee experience- go early, or be prepared to wait in a long line.

I took the goods back to the hotel, haggled with the front desk clerk to extend our reservation to a second night, then went back to the room...
The Woman and the PC were just up- going through morning ablutions, etc and welcomed the hot coffee and the fried dough with quite thanks and bloodshot eyes...

The morning passed uneventfully- they took their time getting ready to head out, and by early afternoon we headed out- it was still raining and the coffee and donuts had worn off and a more substantial meal was needed. We headed to Metarie and my favorite spot for lunch: Drago's.

2 words: Charbroiled Oysters

Oh my...
They were so good I almost ate the shells...

The Woman had a shrimp with remoulade po' boy, and the PC enjoyed the fried shrimp platter- loading up on carbs as a drinking base for the upcoming evening's festivities...

We headed back to the Vieux Carre, I needed to find a place to park overnight and the girls needed to shop a bit... I dropped them in the Quarter and found a curbside spot to park while I used the Interweb to research parking in New Orleans...
No good tips or hidden spots came up in a regular search- Premium Parking has everything in the French Quarter sewn up- and they use variable pricing- overnight on Thursday is $27, overnight on Friday or Saturday is $45.
I used (and later their Android App) to find the Riverview Lot (between the river and Cafe du Monde) for $27/night, even for the weekend.
Perfect- and it was a short walk to the hotel.
I headed back to the hotel- napped a bit and the ladies arrived shortly thereafter.

7:00 found us ready to head out for the evening-
We hit Maspero's Cafe (not the Original Pierre Maspero's, there is a difference...). The french onion soup was a bit lacking, (in my humble opinion), but the alligator sausage po' boy was very good... The Woman had a ham po' boy, and the PC had jambalaya.

Thus fortified, we headed for Bourbon Street again...
The girls were somewhat more subdued, both in their liquor intake rate and in their need to see multiple venues- we walked up and down the street then settled on a little joint with Zydeco music from a live band...

Photo shamelessly stolen from TWWKMT's instagram account...

We sat through 2 sets with only 2 or 3 moderate sized drinks each, then headed back to the hotel... They were still feeling the effects from the previous evening...
I had plans for them for early the next AM, so I encouraged the early retirement.

We got back to the domicile before midnight.
Better- no street pizza, and no one became a multicolored organic fountain that night.
(Little victories! Yay!)

Soon: Part the Third - Mothers, Nick Cage, Marie LeVeau & Frenchman
Stay tuned.


Friday, January 30, 2015

New Orleans - Part the First

As noted last week, the Woman Who Knows Most Things and the Perfect Child and Yours Truly made a little sojourn to New Orleans for some celebratory activities...
Figured I'd share a few more pics with y'all...

Good eats and drinks started early-
We hit the Original Oyster House on Mobile Bay for lunch...
My favorite- the fried crab claws!

About 3 hours later we were in The Big Easy...
We decided on a quick libation before checking into the hotel.

First stop- Pierre Maspero's on Chartres and St. Louis.
The girls had a Canebrake wheat ale by Parrish Beers- YT enjoyed a Hendricks Gin & Tonic... Ambrosia. (They enjoyed the Canebrake so much we had to stop and find a couple sixes to bring home with us.)

We checked into the hotel (using Hotel Tonight app - I talked about it before.. Did you get it yet? You should...) and then headed out for food and an evening of touristy fun on Rue de Bourbon.

We enjoyed a tasty repast at one of my favorites, Napoleon House. (H/t to Pete, who introduced me to this joint back in '94 or '95)
A plate of jambalaya and a muffuletta later we were on to Bourbon St. and the skies opened up... The rain was coming down in sheets which kept the crowds at a minimum.
First stop - Huge Ass Beer.

Several huge ass beers for the girls- and a half-assed cider or two for me, and we were feeling good... The place had a couple guitar players playing some nice bluesy music-
My man Rooster (above) had a good time with the very small crowd in the bar.

But- as much fun Huge Ass Beer was, we had to move on- Rooster was flirting a little too much with the PC. We hauled anchor and headed up the sidewalk to Maison Bourbon.

Good music was pouring out of the place- the girls gave a thumbs up.

I was intrigued by the sign on the wall... (I love hot buttered rum!)

Sadly, I was lured in by a canard... They were out of HBR mix.
I had to make due with my current favored drink- Apple Cider and Fireball.
(And this is where the wheels began to fall off)
The girls, feeling bad that there was no Buttered Rum, hot or otherwise, decided we needed shots.
Tequila? No.
Jägermeister? No.
Something different... Something...evil.
Pickleback Shots.
Jameson & a pickle brine chaser.
So apparently this is a thing now...

A couple shots and beers later and we were feeling fine...

The jazz quintet played 4 or 5 songs then took a break,so we moved on from there...

We had passed Saints & Sinners on the way to Maison Bourbon, and
they were cooking crawfish on the front porch- I was a bit peckish, and
know I needed more fuel to burn the alcohol- so on the way back we stopped in
and I had a pound of mudbugs. More beer for the girls- And another round of pickleback shots for everyone.
The PC had a few of the crawfish but I had the lions share...

The rain was still coming down, so we stopped to take shelter in a daiquiri & pizza joint-
The ladies tried to tamp down the beer & shots with a couple slices...

The rain slacked off so we headed back for the hotel, stopping only
to mug for the camera as I was trying to get a shot of a architecturally
pleasing building...

Due to an iron constitution and a body mass index pushing maximum density,
my blood-alcohol ratio was just perfect for inducing sleep without having to
keep one foot on the floor to keep the bed from spinning.
The girls- not so much.

I will spare you the details of later that night- Suffice to say that
the pizza and a good bit of the beer made a reappearance in a
very messy manner...
Stay Tuned - Part 2 is on the way.


Thursday, January 29, 2015

New Leatherman... Looks Interesting.

One of my compatriots forwarded a link to a new Leatherman tool that looks quite interesting, as the title of this post implies...

The Leatherman Tread TM

An impressive array of tools on this thing...

At $150 bucks I don't know if I'm in the market, but it looks pretty cool.
Can't wait to read the user reviews on Amazon when it goes to wide release.


Saturday, January 24, 2015

Swingin' @ The Spotted Cat

Frenchman Street, NOLA

Friday, January 23, 2015

Good Morning Vieux Carré

Since the tale of last night's festivities has not concluded yet, I am forced to load the free ice cream machine with a fast funny from the flight back from Sydney...

(Deleted story already written up and posted a couple days ago.. Oops. Sorry.)

I guess the flight staff have started to embrace the suckitude that Is transoceanic air travel.

In regards to the picture from my Instagram feed from last night- sadly, it was not raining in the hotel bathroom at 1:00 this AM... The Woman and the PC would have appreciated the help in making the porcelain throne room habitable again...

Thursday, January 22, 2015

And For My Next Trick...

After a couple hours sleep I was back in the office to tie up a few loose ends...
This morning The Woman and the PC and Yours Truly jumped in the car and headed  west.
After a brief stop in Mobile for lunch, we landed in New Orleans for a couple days of celebrating...
We didn't have a real shindig for the PC's graduation since I had to head to Oz this is the Grad Party.

Drinks at Pierre Masperos, dinner at Napoleon House, now enjoying beverages on  Bourbon St...

And I'm taking heat for drinking a FSU Beer...
(A half-assed beer- a semihole. Heh.)


Finally back...
Even made it through Chicago without a delay.
After the 15 hour SYD-SFO, then a 4 hour flight to O'Hare I was certain I was going to be delayed, but I dodged that bullet...
Had a lovely dinner in the United Club in the airport...

Wednesday, January 21, 2015

SOTU Followup

So all the news this am is about the "epic burn" that Obama gave to the Republican party as all the elephants at the SOTU began applauding when Obama said he had no more campaigns to run...
He manages to go off-script and show his petulant child side with "...I know, because I won both of them."

So much for that conciliatory tone he was looking for last week...

Of course Slate, Salon, Mediaite and the ObamaMedia are just aflutter about his mastery of the off-the-cuff repartee and that any right of center needs to rush off and find a  get a good skin graft, 'cause that's The Burn Of The Century.

Morons... All of them.


Tuesday, January 20, 2015

From the SYD-SFO Flight

One last one from today's adventures, since I'm getting ready to board my last flight for the day...
During the Flight Attendant's spiel on taxiing in Sydney, she said:

"...For the inmates in economy class, the restrooms are located in the mid cabin and all the way to the rear..."

At least that's what it sounded like...

Yeah, that's about right...

TBG - Travelin'

SOTU Commentary- Horseshit From POTUS

Nice to be back in the US-
Grabbed a USAToday (USAYesterday?) and checked out the front page...

The most laugh-getting quote:
'Obama steals his own thunder'-
... "And I'll call on this new Congress to join me in putting aside the political games and finding areas where we agree, so we can deliver for the American people."

What happened to the swaggering moron with his 'I won. We're gonna do it my way' attitude?

Considering he campaigned in 2008 with the "I will work with both parties to find solutions that work for all Americans" promise that he immediately broke- its interesting that he can make a statement like this with a straight face...
Lying weasel.

Of course, most of the horseshit he's shoveling won't pass Congress, so he and the Left will be able to point to the failure as "Obstructionist Conservatives" keeping the middle class down and using them as political ammo for 2016, rather than making proposals that might actually work.

Do anyone believe anything this snake says any more?

TBG - Back in the USA!

Memories From This Time Last Year...

'Round about this time last year I was on my way to Sochi and all the 'fun' that was endemic therein. Thereof. Therefor. Whatever.

I am reminded of this because of the 'entertainment' I am getting as I am waiting in the Sydney airport waiting to see if I actually will be on my 'tentatively rebooked' flight to SFO, ORD and finally JAX.

There is a couple and their little girl sitting across from me, and the the little crumbsnatcher is the most girly-girl I've ever seen... She's got two Barbie-type dolls and she's having the best time.
She's the best behaved young'un I've seen in a good long while.

It's the Barbies that are reminding me of Sochi, and a lesson I learned whilst in-country...

Basically it comes down to this-
Barbie dolls and their ilk have given us an unrealistic image of women...

I realized this in Sochi ...
I discovered that Russian girls don't contain a number of smaller Russian girls inside them.
Wow. Who knew?

I know... I'm warped and depraved...
Just keep your distance and we'll all get through this.


Monday, January 19, 2015


Just finished a game of Missionaries & Cannibals and got an emergency row seat out of the deal.
Lucky me.

Downside: Next to bathroom, 6'+ 275lb dude next to me.
It's gonna be an epic battle for the armrest.

TBG- Travelin'!

Hmmm - Never Thought Of It That Way...

As I was trying to get my rebooking sorted this morning, the level-one United rep (the guy who stands between the queued up passengers and the Ticketing Agents) and I were chatting regarding the cancelled flight...
I remarked that last year I was on the same cancelled SYD-LAX flight... He gave me a sidelong look and slowly nodded his head.
"Any of your other flights get "mysteriously" cancelled?" he asked.
"Loads of them. Probably 10 this past year." I said.
"Hm. Ever think the problem might be you?" he said, with a trace of humor...

Never thought of that.

Maybe it IS me...


United Airlines Math: 2+2=Fusebox

So, Flight UA840 to LAX from Sydney was cancelled due to "mechanical reasons"...

Can one of you engineers out there explain how a pilot spending the previous evening down at Westin Hotel in the CBD doing tequila shots and chasing the local hookers horizontal entertainment constitutes "mechanical reasons"?
Just curious.

(Hey, Bright side: I'm not rebooked on Malaysia Air.)


The Definition of Insanity: Trusting United Airlines

Once again, I give United Airlines a chance to stick it in and break it off, and they do it with gusto.
At dinner last night I got this:

Astute Constant Readers will remember that last year United did the exact same thing to me. At least this time I found out last night and got to try to rebook quickly.
I am tired-tired-tired of these jokers.

What is that classic definition of 'insanity'? Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results?
I must be insane for continuing to book my travel with United.

I mean, it's one thing if a flight is delayed occasionally, but this is happening to me way too often. In addition, if this was a short business trip to Houston and back, it wouldn't be so painful- but I've been gone a month and it just adds insult to injury.

Well- hopefully I will be on an alternate flight...
I'm heading for the airport in a few minutes, we'll see how it goes.


Sunday, January 18, 2015

SOTU & Taxes

So, from the news I've been reading this AM, seems that the ObamaMedia Sunday Morning Talk Circuit got their White House marching orders and started hyping the tax hikes that the President will be backing...
The one that amuses me the most is the 529 taxing.
529s (prepaid college savings plans) were
The plans were subject to taxing before 2001, but the law was changed- and since the Left never met a tax they don't just loooove- let's just put this one back on the books...
After all- Obama will be giving everyone 2 years at a ObamaCollege, ObamaSchool? ObamAcademy- yeah, that's good- (Community College) for free.
If you are a responsible and able to scrimp & save to be be able to put some money away so your young'un can go to a better school, well then, by jingo, you can give up some to Uncle Sam since obviously you don't NEED it.


Sunday Music Interlude - Cold Chisel - Khe Sanh (1973)

The Australia Open Series - Sydney (a/k/a Apia International Sydney) is in the books-
The WTA winner was Petra Kvitova and on the ATP side Viktor Troicki won.

Now for the last epic struggle-
We're in the midst of striking the site here at the Sydney Olympic Park.
One more day and I'll be on the big grey bird headed home.
This has been a long one here in Oz...
The staff and the folks I've met?
All just excellent people.

Three years of missing out on the holidays back home is probably all I can stand.
As much as I like the people and the gig, It might take some serious coercion to get me back down here again.

And I've traveled round the world from year to year
And each one found me aimless, one more year the worse for wear
And I've been back to South East Asia
But the answer sure ain't there
But I'm drifting north, to check things out again

Well the last plane out of Sydney's almost gone
Yeah the last plane out of Sydney's almost gone
And it's really got me worried
I'm goin' nowhere and I'm in a hurry
And the last plane out of Sydney's almost gone

Stay tuned.


Saturday, January 17, 2015

Psychopath or Sociopath?

It's important to know the difference...
Do YOU know the difference?
Characteristics of a sociopath are as followed:
1. Sociopaths are very charming.
2. Sociopaths can be extremely manipulative and will try to con you whenever possible.
3. Sociopaths feel that they are entitled to everything.
4. Sociopaths will lie continuously to get what they want. They can even sometimes manipulate a lie detector.
5. Sociopaths have no remorse, shame or guilt.
6. Sociopaths will show love and happiness only when it serves their purpose. None of the feelings are genuine.
7. Sociopaths have no room for love in their life.
8. Sociopaths need to have excitement in their lives or live on the edge.
9. Sociopaths have lack of empathy when their victims suffer pain that they have caused.
10. Sociopaths believe that they are all mightier than thou, there is no concern on how their behavior impacts others.
11. Sociopaths usually have a long history of juvenile delinquency as well as behavior problems.
12. Sociopaths will never take blame for anything they have done to anyone no matter if it is family or friend.
13. Sociopaths have many sexual partners and tend to act out many sexual acts.
14. Sociopaths rarely stay in one place for a long time (home/work).
15. Sociopaths will change themselves if they know it will keep them from being found out.
Wow. 9 for 15. Hmmm.

Characteristics of a psychopath are as followed:

1. Psychopaths use superficial charm to lure their victims.
2. Psychopaths are extremely self-centered.
3. Psychopaths must always do something to keep themselves from boredom.
4. Psychopaths are very deceptive and tend to lie continuously.
5. Psychopaths show no remorse of guilt towards their victims.
6. Psychopaths are very predatory and usually will live off other people.
7. Psychopaths have many sexual partners in their lifetime.
8. Psychopaths are very impulsive with their lifestyle.
9. Psychopaths are always blaming other people for their actions.
10. Psychopaths never have a realistic view of their lives. (king of the world or from another planet)
11. Psychopaths always want psychological gratification in sexual and criminal activities.
12. Psychopaths tend to try suicide, rarely succeeding. 
 3 of 12.... Hmmm again.

Hint: Being from the US and owning a metric shitload of firearms doesn't make me a psychopath...
But calling me one will bring out the sociopathic tendencies in me and will cause you great embarrassment, discomfort and ridicule...

Friday, January 16, 2015

I Don't Blend In

If you look carefully at 1:14:20, 1:27:21 and 1:36:45 you will see why I am considered to be a "hulking menace in the background" as opposed to the "unobtrusive but watchful presence"...

See the video here.
(No, at the 1:36:45 mark I was NOT texting... I was making notes on our exit strategy, thankewverymuch.)


Thursday, January 15, 2015

Good Times -Shanghai Pranking

I haven't had any bonehead user errors yet today, and I haven't had to threaten anyone's life since late Wednesday, so I really don't have anything to put into the ice cream machine.

In lieu of actual current content, I'll be sharing a story of our time in Shanghai 2014 and a little prankage that occurred this year.
(My memory was jogged by a post over at Old NFO's website- Do you read him every day? You should... Tasty stuff!)

We had a noob as an adjunct to our team this year- the nephew of one of the Honchos at the Tournament. Good kid (and I mean kid- 17 or 18 years old).
Honcho asked if we could impart some words of wisdom and life lessons to young James over the course of the event. No worries- we were on it.

So young James was busied with some basic tasks for the event, and did a passable job.

James is on the right- his brother Peter on the left.
As the tournament progressed, young James didn't screw up too badly and we decided perhaps a Snipe Hunt was in order.
(In the days of my Sordid Youth, I was caught not once but twice- I spent the entire day running from one end of the Marathon Airport to the other- in search of 100' of flight line, and another time I spend 3 hours looking for a large bottle of prop wash. I was a dumbass.)

So a plan was formulated - I enlisted the help of several co-conspirators and then CJ whistled up young James...
"Hey- I need the tube of squelch grease. I lent our last tube to Mal up in the control room. Really need it fast..."
And young James was off at top speed- up to the upper level control room to see Mal, who sent him back down to the event level to see Chase, who sent him back up to the upper level to see Alex in scoring, who sent him down to see Ed in the Admin office...then to the press room I think-
Up and down, back and forth...
Poor bastard.
When we finally let him off the hook he was quite a good sport about it...We had a good laugh- and he learned the lesson:
Never trust anyone. Especially the people you trust.

(Unlike some people back in 2013- who took the missing Mercedes S-Class I "borrowed" much too seriously...)

Good times- good times...


Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Bonus Music/Viral Video - Straya

This video has been sweeping the Interweb Down Under-
Give it a listen:

Outkast's 'Hey Ya' reworked into the very unofficial national anthem of 'Straya'

Boy these folks are just full of jingoism and kangaroo shit, eh?


Tech Support: Notes from the Battlefield - Continued

(Talking to a User on one of the kiosk machines in the lounge.)

Yours Truly: "Ok, put the cursor on the link and click your left mouse button."

User: (rummaging noise) "I can't find the left mouse. I think someone may have taken it."

(More banging from the server room...)


Tech Support: Notes from the Battlefield - Part 2

-Fuck It, I'm Done Edition-

So... Part of this job is doing end-user connectivity support.
Someone has a tablet, smartphone or laptop and can't log into the internet because of an authentication issue, and we get a call-out.

In the last few days, there has been some issues on machines where you have to disconnect from the correct network and try to log into the wrong segment, then go back to the right one- THEN you get the log-in screen.
The IT Infrastructure group is working on the problem... I figure it will take them another 6 to 10 days to get back with me, so in the mean time we will do this SSID switcheroo in order to get people working.
(I'm all about expediency. Problem solving. Gettin' it done.)

So... Mr. Samsung Tablet is having an issue getting on line this AM...

I do the network segment swap- connect to the right SSID, then hit his browser to get to the login/portal page...

Know how Chrome has a feature where your most visited sites are displayed as thumbnails on the opening screen?

7 of the 8 thumbnails were porn sites.

I handed his tablet back and went to wash my hands.

Fuck that shit... I'm walking people through the solutions from now on.
I'm not touching their phones, tablets or laptops anymore.


Monday, January 12, 2015

I Must Be Getting Mellow In My Dotage...

Sydney Olympic Park is just chock-full of bicyclists every flippin' day.
And I'm talking these lycra-clad bags of douche and their $8000 carbonfibre-and-unicorn-earwax bicycles, racing around the 6km perimeter road- not your typical two-wheeled tourist-types.
I have nothing against bicyclists in general, but these morons think they own the roads hereabouts...

(This is A moron, but not THE moron.)

Edwin Frack Boulevard is a four-lane split median road, and at 7AM there ain't no one on the road except the occasional idjit like me, and a boatload of LWAHs (Lycra-Wearing AssHats) that come zipping by every couple minutes.

Long story short, at around 7:15 AM I was in the midst of parallel parking in front of the hotel to pick up my co-worker, when a Lance Armstrong wanna-be comes racing by- 
"Learn to f*cking park, asshole" he shouts as he goes past.
Really, I was just pulling into the space...
You felt I needed insulting because you had to move over a bit on the (very empty) road?
Now... (And this is where the title comes from...)
All I could think of doing at this point was...

(...Wait for it....)

Finish parking the car and waiting for my man Andy show up so we could get to work...
(I know. Surprised me too.)

There was a time (not too long ago) that Billy Bicycle would have felt the tap of a front bumper sending him off to a high-speed impact with a eucalyptus tree, or perhaps a car door might be opened in front of him, and I'd still have been back to pick up Andy and make it to the site on time.
Billy would get that special feeling- the kind of feeling you get as you ride to the hospital with your teeth in your pocket.

But not this day...

I must be slipping. Getting mellow.


What the hell is happening to me?

Sunday, January 11, 2015

Sunday Musical Interlude - 2 Cellos

The wild & crazy guys at 2 Cellos cover Avicii's "Wake Me Up"...


Quotes To Live (or Die) By

To the people that insist on pissing me off...

(And the ones that do it unknowingly too- this does not excuse stupid behavior.)

I'm Always polite. Always respectful. And always making plans to kill everyone within a 50' radius. Just in case.

"There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man." 

"You might call them soft, because they're very reluctant to kill, and they might agree with you, but they're soft the way the ocean is soft, and, well; ask any sea captain how harmless and puny the ocean can be."

"When kind men grow angry, things are about to change."

"When the nice ones snap, it's always a good show."

"Don't ever mistake my silence for ignorance, my calmness for acceptance, or my kindness for weakness." 

"You're too nice a guy to know so many ways to kill someone..."

"If you have to look along the shaft of an arrow from the wrong end, if a man has you entirely at his mercy, then hope like hell that man is an evil man. Because the evil like power, power over people, and they want to see you in fear. They want you to know you're going to die. So they'll talk. They'll gloat. They'll watch you squirm. They'll put off the moment of murder like another man will put off a good cigar. So hope like hell your captor is an evil man. A good man will kill you with hardly a word."


Friday, January 09, 2015

Tech Support: Notes from the Battlefield

From the "Too stupid to own a computer" file:

(While walking a User thought a procedure in Windows)

Yours Truly: "I need you to right-click on the document."
User: "Ok."
Yours Truly: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
User: "No."
Yours Truly: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up
User: "No."
Yours Truly: "Ok... Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
User: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."

(That banging noise coming out of the server room is me, putting dents into the side of the server rack with my forehead.)


Thursday, January 08, 2015

Hey Mon...

Put dem cables back when you're done, Mon.


Monday, January 05, 2015

Elliot? You're Not Gonna Name The Kid Elliot...

(This here is what we call in the bidness an "Inside Joke".)